Brewers bring back Betancourt

Tuesday was a dark day for Brewers fans. Actually, it's been a dark couple of days, depending on whether you strongly hate or just hate the Kyle Lohse signing. The Brewers brought back a familiar face in Yuniesky Betancourt (pronounced Un-tal-en-ted Sh-it-bag), who'll serve as a utility infielder with Taylor Green hitting the DL with a hip issue and Jeff Bianchi having his own hip problems (those geezers). Yuni just opted out of a minor league deal with the Phillies, a team that employs Ryan Howard, Michael Young, Delmon Young, Chad Durbin, Kevin Frandsen and Michael Martinez, yet found Yuni just too shitty to commit to for the 2013 season. If traditional stats are your thing, you'll note that Betancourt has been a flaming train wreck of a player throughout his career. If advanced stats are your thing, you'll note that Betancourt's career is a nuclear disaster on top of a flaming train wreck that also happens to have killed a litter of kittens.

Betancourt "served" as the team's "shortstop" during their 2011 playoff run, and spent 2012 as a part-time statue for a dominant Kansas City Royals squad. Hopefully, Betancourt will see minimal at-bats and be the the sacrificial lamb when Green and/or Corey Hart return from injury, but maybe the baseball gods hate us and he'll see 400 at-bats somehow. But let's leave on a happy note. Here's a Yuni highlight!